Emotional Overload: Understanding Its Impact

We are emotional beings. Emotions correspond with the bumps and knocks of living, giving life richness. The excitements, sorrows, passions add color to our world.  Sometimes life, in all its fury, whips emotions up into a powerful storm; chemicals race through our veins, signaling danger. Ideally, in these critical moments, we act in wisdom, managing the stress and conquering the foe, growing confident in our resilience and skill. Yet, life doesn’t care about our skills, resources, or persistence. Some events (or a series of accumulating events) are too much. Our ability to process bogs down, we freeze, we dissociate or explode when emotions overload. We collapsed when emotionally overwhelmed.

​Emotions, Memory, Reaction​

Emotions prioritize experience, storing explicit details of experiences that provoked strong emotions, giving importance to the event, reminding of the past as a warning when similar elements are encountered. We scan the environment, transferring data to various modules of the brain, alerting on perceived dangers—threats to our well-being. New information is given meaning through associations to past experiences, conveying dangers and opportunity. Feeling affects arise from this unconscious process of retrieving meaning, enlivening the body and motivating action.

Significant threats poke biological systems into action, preparing body and mind for combat, the message warns, “this must be addressed!” The biological system activates, prompting immediate action. The threat whether real or misperceived moves the body to protect. Threats disrupt calmness.

​A raised voice, a shadow, an uncomfortable question, a critical remark, unexpected change, or a crazed man with a ninja sword move the body through physiological changes. Depending on the immediacy and severity of the information, the heart speeds, blood flows, and complex cognitive appraisal are suspended.

Suppressing Dangerous Impulses During Emotional Overload

On our journey to self-actualization, recognizing bodily excitements early and responding effectively is essential. Sometimes, we must impulsively act for survival, and when events slow, evaluate the experience in detail—duck first, find out who through the rock later. But many events don’t demand this immediacy. We have time to look a little closer and act from a wiser mind. By utilizing time, We can evaluate reactions, suppressing impulses that impose on goals or diminish the quality of our lives. When we slow down, we can replace thoughtless retorts, violent swings, or disloyal betrayals with purposeful action when we pause to think. Abundant futures require thoughtful presents. If we blindly charge through life, thoughtlessly serving emotions, our lives our left to chaotic chance.

​Our blind subservience to emotion strangles vitality from our futures, leading down dead-end pathways that ruin relationships and destroy opportunities. We must intervene with top-down cognitions.

Emotional Overload Overwhelms

When our biological functions operate smoothly, life is great. We charge through daily routines adjusting to the minor peaks and valleys of emotions. Emotions serve our survival and flourishing remarkably well. Every once in a while, we’re thrown out of whack, pushing our homeostatic balance beyond comfortable windows, but we make adjustments, reign in the rascal emotions, and realign our lives.

Emotional overwhelm pushes beyond normal processing capacity, requiring adaptations that are costly. Lawrence Heller and Aline LaPierre explain in their wonderful book on emotion:

“Manageable levels of overload to the organism’s capacity to process are experienced as stress and distress, but when stress and distress become unbearable, the organism manages the overwhelm first by numbing, then by splitting, and finally by fragmenting. These life-saving dissociative processes exact a terrible cost” (Heller & LaPierre, 2012).

We Respond to Overwhelm in a Number of Ways

​Numbing:

Numbing is a psychological process of shutting out feelings. Since emotions play a primary role in memory and learning, numbing disrupts the system. Our ability to use emotions in navigating complex environments is hampered. Feeling affects still exist and still motivate; we just don’t consciously recognize their involvement and can’t compensate for dangerous impulsive reactions.

Often in numbing, impulsive reactionary responses, instead of understood is reinterpreted in justifying logical terms. Repairing and leaning from mistakes is jeopardized since we actions are interpreted in logical and justifiable ways.

​See Self Deceptions for more on this topic

Splitting:

This psychological process dumps productive reasoning for dogmatic all-or-nothing cognitive rigidity. Our partner is seen as a perfect angel or a menacing demon. There is no mitigating in-between of an imperfect human that is relatively good but occasionally makes mistakes. Splitting is dangerous because we sacrifice our evolutionary advantages of complex processing.

​See All-or Nothing Mindset for more on this topic

Fragmenting:

Fragmenting is a disorder in processing experiences in agreement with our autobiographical narratives of self. Our experiences evade integration into self narratives. This disrupts growth. When experiences conflict with our visions of self, we have opportunities for enlightening reflection. Perhaps, our life needs adjusting. Life provides bountiful lessons for growth, however, when everything is fragmented, we gain nothing from the chaos. We can be mean, bitter and hateful and not understand why we are lonely.

See Manipulating Reality for more on this topic

Failures of Integration

​​”Healthy regulation of emotions implies ample access to both positive and negative feelings, and an ability to express them, which in turn fosters self-acceptance, personal growth, and the capacity for interpersonal intimacy” (Roth et al. 2018).

Integration is a foundational concept of Daniel Siegel’s interpersonal neurobiology. Siegel explains that integration has “two fundamental components: ‘differentiation’ and ‘linkage.’” He defines ‘differentiation’ as our psychological process are composed of specialized and individualized components. “Linkage,” he explains,  “involves the connection of separate areas to each other” (Siegel, 2020). 

The concept of integration is that integrations makes the whole greater than the sum of the parts. In emotional overload, we exclude one or more of the processes, operating on fewer cylinders than our organism’s capabilities.

What Causes Emotional Overload?

Some life events simply overwhelm. We are incapable of the punishing blow, and our coping mechanisms scramble for psychological survival. The experience shatters previous safe assumptions about the world and our wellness disintegrates.

​See Post Traumatic Growth for more information on this topic

Ego Depletion

While emotional overwhelm may be a single event, often it is a series of events, slowing draining resources, leading to complete depletion and burnout.

Ego depletion, a concept suggesting that our capacity for self-control is a limited resource that can be temporarily depleted through use, can significantly contribute to emotional overload. When we exert self-control in one area, such as resisting a tempting treat or focusing on a demanding task, we draw upon this finite reservoir of mental energy. As these resources become depleted, our ability to regulate subsequent behaviors and responses, including our emotions, becomes compromised. This weakened capacity for self-regulation means we are less equipped to manage and modulate our emotional reactions when faced with stressors or negative experiences.

Consequently, when ego depletion sets in, we become more susceptible to emotional overload. Minor frustrations that we would normally handle with relative ease can feel overwhelming. We might find ourselves reacting more intensely to negative feedback, experiencing greater difficulty in calming down when upset, or struggling to manage feelings of anxiety or sadness. The mental energy that would typically be used to consciously control our emotional responses is no longer readily available, leaving us more vulnerable to being swept away by our feelings. This can lead to a sense of being emotionally flooded, making it harder to cope with everyday challenges and potentially contributing to increased stress and decreased well-being.

​See Ego Depletion and Burnout for more on these topics

Common Causes of Emotional Overload:

• Victimization
• Relationship Struggles
• Financial Strains
• Loss (loved ones, important possessions)
• Overworked
• ​Natural Disasters

Preventing Emotional Overload

We are never completely immune to emotional overwhelm. Life can always deliver more than we can process. I’m not suggesting we are victims of fate with no avenues of escape. There is many things we can do to build resilience and protect our wellness. Our preparations will protect us most of the time against emotional overwhelm.

Knowledge

Understanding the human heritage of limiting imperfections can save us from ignorant expectations of ease. Knowledge is essential for integration of thought and emotion. Science assists with understanding our seemingly lawless impulses and damaging protections.

We expand our knowledge in more domains than science. We gain personal insights through reflection and mindfulness. Understanding our propensities, our likes, and desires. We also learn about significant others in our lives, attuning to their inner worlds. The more accurate our knowledge the better our predictions, and the fewer surprises.

Professional Help

Significant memories tagged as important by emotion assist to process the present, directing action to avoid dangers fraught with unnecessary pain. The salient memories effectively alert of recurring threats. However, overly abusive and chaotic pasts are difficult to be categorized. The flow of information is marred, insufficiently balanced and may misdirect.

​The mind protects in a variety of ways that adapts to chaos rather than normalcy. The patterns of adapting continue even when adult life is less threatening. Emotions continue to disrupt wellness—our emotional setting is overly sensitive. Small events trigger emotions warning of an impending catastrophe. We often need professional help to rein in these nuisance responses.

Therapy Styles to Help with Overwhelm

Several types of therapy can be effective in treating emotional overwhelm, including:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Helps individuals identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors.
• Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Combines cognitive-behavioral techniques with mindfulness practices.
• Mindfulness-Based Therapies: Focus on cultivating awareness and acceptance of present-moment experiences.
• Body Based Therapies: Help relieve stress through a variety of whole body relaxation exercises that involve integrating mind and body.
• Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT): EFT works with clients to be aware of emotional experiences and create narratives around emotions that help emotions motivate productive action.
• Meditation and Relaxation Techniques: Can be incorporated into therapy to help manage stress and reduce symptoms of overwhelm.

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These therapies aim to provide individuals with strategies to cope with intense emotions and improve their ability to manage stress. It’s important to work with a mental health professional to determine the most appropriate type of therapy for one’s specific needs.

Positive Emotions

Positive emotions serve as powerful regulators against emotional overwhelm through various psychological and physiological mechanisms, notably described by the Broaden-and-Build theory (Murphy, 2020). This theory posits that positive emotions, such as joy, interest, contentment, and love, broaden an individual’s momentary thought-action repertoires, encouraging exploration and the building of lasting personal resources.

Diana Fosha explains:

“The categorical emotions necessarily narrow our focus to the challenges most salient for survival. By contrast, positive emotions broaden it and lead to the enhancement and expansion of our repertoires, which in turn, motivate and fuel exploration” (Fosha, 2009).

John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux wrote:

“Positive emotions broaden our thought and action skill sets, specifically the skills and behavior we regularly use. When we experience one of the main positive emotions, our minds tend to open up and we are able to think outside the box” (Kim & Cordeaux, 2021).

When faced with emotional overwhelm, this broadened perspective allows individuals to think more flexibly and creatively, potentially identifying novel coping strategies or alternative interpretations of the stressful situation. Instead of being narrowly focused on the source of distress, positive emotions can help individuals see a wider range of possibilities and engage in behaviors that promote resilience and well-being, thereby mitigating the intensity of the overwhelm.

Undoing Hypothesis

Furthermore, the Undoing Hypothesis suggests that positive emotions have the capacity to physiologically “undo” the lingering effects of negative emotions (Murphy, 2022). When individuals experience intense negative emotions, their bodies often exhibit heightened physiological arousal, such as increased heart rate, blood pressure, and skin conductance. The Undoing Hypothesis proposes that experiencing positive emotions following or even during a stressful event can accelerate the return of these physiological markers to baseline levels. This physiological calming effect can help individuals regain emotional control more quickly, preventing them from remaining in a prolonged state of overwhelm. By counteracting the physiological impact of negative emotions, positive emotions facilitate a return to a more balanced and regulated emotional state, enhancing the individual’s ability to cope effectively with future stressors.

Supportive Relationships

We can’t wait for the emergency to build life-giving relationships. Supportive others are necessary during dire events. We can’t survive on our own. We gallantly proclaim, “I don’t need anyone.” Yet, our over-reliance on self falls flat when emotions overload. In those moments, we don’t need superficial niceties, but gentleness, compassion and support.

Cultivating strong and meaningful connections with others should not be viewed as a contingency plan for when crises strike, but rather as an ongoing investment in our emotional well-being. These life-giving relationships act as a crucial buffer against emotional overload, providing a consistent source of support, understanding, and perspective. Knowing that we have people in our lives who genuinely care and are willing to offer a safe space to process our emotions can significantly reduce the likelihood of reaching a point of overwhelm in the first place. This proactive approach to building a reliable support system ensures that when difficult times inevitably arise, we have a network of individuals who can offer the gentleness, compassion, and practical assistance needed to navigate the storm and facilitate recovery.

​See Supportive Environments for more on this topic

Basic Wellness

The most basic habits of wellness play huge dividends in emotional regulation. We often envision physical wellness as an entirely different field of self-improvement. It’s not. Our physical wellness is closely intertwined to psychological wellness. When one is off, the other suffers.

Basic laws of health:

• Nutritious diet
• Exercise
• Sleep
• Quiet reflection (prayer, meditation, nature walks)

​See Wellness Basics for more on this topic

Associated Concepts

• Accumulating Anxiety: This refers to the gradual buildup of stress, fear, or worry over time, leading to an increasing sense of unease or distress. This type of anxiety often results from ongoing or unresolved issues, and can have a significant impact on a person’s mental and emotional well-being.
• General Adaptation Syndrome (G-A-S): This theory developed by Hans Selye, describes the body’s response to stress in three stages: alarm, resistance, and exhaustion. Selye’s work underscores the impact of stress on health and the need for effective stress management to maintain well-being.
• Demoralization Syndrome: is a profound psychological state marked by hopelessness and a loss of meaning, significantly affecting motivation and mental health. It arises from stressors like chronic illness, trauma, and societal pressures, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
• Arousal Theories: These theories explore the role of physiological arousal in motivating behavior, seeking to maintain an optimal level of alertness and activation.
• Emotional Dysregulation: This refers to excessive emotional arousal that disrupts healthy decision-making and exceeds an individual’s tolerance window. It can arise from faulty biological mechanisms, environment factors, and traumatic experiences.
• Coping Skills: These skills encompass psychological and behavioral strategies for managing stress, emotions, and challenging scenarios. Effective mechanisms include problem-solving, mindfulness, physical exercise, seeking support, artistic expression, healthy lifestyle choices, cognitive-behavioral techniques, and seeking purpose.

A Few Words by Psychology Fanatic

Armor protecting against emotional overload requires more than a couple forced adjustments, the chains to our pasts don’t reprogram easily. Healthy resilience requires repeated and attentive actions. The dangerous world may at times overwhelm, overloading our systems, but if we have a safety net in place, we can survive, get back on our feet, and move forward. We may be injured and require some healing, but we recover a little wiser and a little stronger.

To cultivate this resilience, it is essential to engage in ongoing self-care practices that nurture both our emotional and physical well-being. This includes fostering supportive relationships, seeking professional guidance when needed, and creating environments where we can express our emotions freely without fear of judgment. By integrating these elements into our daily lives, we not only build a buffer against emotional overload but also enhance our capacity for growth amidst adversity. Ultimately, embracing the journey of healing means acknowledging that setbacks are part of the process. Each challenge faced offers an opportunity for reflection and learning. As we navigate through life’s complexities, let us remember that while emotional overload may temporarily disrupt our equilibrium, it is through these experiences that we gain valuable insights about ourselves and the world around us. With time and perseverance, we emerge more resilient—capable of facing future storms with renewed strength and clarity.